Nowadays, I am I terribly in depress and trauma. It is a pressure to know my trial result although I have worked hard. It is a pressure to hear and listen to a bloody nag and insulted words from my parents. It is very epilepsy for me to think about teachers and schools. It is bullshit for me to hear from mama that abah is very care about me. Seriously talking, I have no idea when is he actually DO CARE about me. Sigh. God, why am I this stupid? Why am I does not have the courage to study. The deadly bloody war is just around the corner. ONE MONTH of studying and struggling does not make me feel bad at all for doing nothing. I think I should have jumped last night from the east coast mall rooftop. Am I useless in academics and achievements? The answer would be YES. I have surrendered my self. I have GIVE UP! -dufuss, NV-
